Cats Only Have Nine Lives – The Sheep Drench is Out of Stock – Dibaba Goes Down – And Turbo Cops Ten Overs Filled With Underarm Balls

The world’s most reinvigorated and reinvented pacer Dibaba was looking for her tenth win in a row since moving to the Turbo Trainor barn last night at Penrith, but with sheep dip so in demand that the shelves have been stripped bare it was not to be. Turbo almost pulled off the magic ten picket […]

The Peter Profit Mail is the Best in Town – Now, Do You Wanna Buy a Pair of Sheep Dip Filled Bulla Thickened Cream Earrings? – They’re All the Go This Season

Well, here you are. Turbo’s thrown a positive to the steroid levamisole, aka banned in horses sheep dip/drench (as opposed to a milkshake drench – I prefer to sip mine myself). Not personally swabbed up[ – that’s still to come, and it ain’t roids – but his horse has thrown one. Chubby Checker to be […]

Ellmer Hasn’t Hoofed It – His Owner and Trainer are Just Otherwise Detained – But Where the Hell Has Coward Kenny Disappeared To?

I guess it is no surprise to learn that Ellmer’s Hoofing It has been scratched from race 4 at Globe Derby tonight. Ellmer’s owner and trainer have a bit on their plate at the moment, although not much in their bowl. Dennis that is scratched from Race 5’s connections are in the same boat. Oh, […]

Jumping Jase Treats the Penrith Punters to a Taste of His Genius – It’s Official – He’s a 50m Better Trainer Than Kerry Ann Morris

https://www-harness-org-au.akamaized.net/nsw/PEC08042103.mp4 There is no man in the world training better than Jumping Jason Grimson at the moment. Or getting better results anyway. Jumping says its his genius, cynics say its the gear, the rainforest lawyers say don’t offer any more opinions on the matter, so I won’t. We will just stick to the facts. Kerry […]

Horses Improving 70 Metres in a Week? Bah Humbug! – Pull the Other One Narissa, It Jingles – UPDATE ONE WEEK LATER – JINGLES HAS SHAVED ANOTHER 1.6 SECONDS OFF HIS TIME – YEAH GOOD

https://www-harness-org-au.akamaized.net/qld/APC16022114.mp4 I get really sick of trainers and training teams that I believe are cheating both us punters and their professional rivals by breaking the rules of racing. Why can’t these people just be honest? If they are going to do something naughty to a horse, what’s the problem with telling us all? Obviously the […]

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